ultrafacts:

pizzaismylifepizzaisking:

ultrafacts:

Source If you want more facts, follow Ultrafacts

Secret Service: “Dammit, we need to stop playing hide and seek.”

Calvin Coolidge: “You lose.”

#JustPresidentThings

Also, apparently as President he often went to dinner parties he hated. Someone finally asked why he went. His reply: “Got to eat somewhere.” Source

(via starshard)

konec0:

sleepyferret:

shitfacedanon:

dat-soldier:

sonnetscrewdriver:

dat-soldier:

did-you-kno:

Source


back the fuck up

There’s another story that I like about a Chinese general who had to defend a city with only a handful of soldiers from a huge enemy horde that was in all likelihood going to steamroll the place flat within hours of showing up.
So when said horde did arrive, they saw the general sitting outside the city’s open gates, drinking tea. The horde sent a couple of emissaries over to see what was what, and the general greeted them cheerfully and invited them all to come and take tea with him.
The horde decided that this was a scenario that had “MASSIVE FUCKING TRAP” written all over it in beautiful calligraphy and promptly fucked off.
Whoever that general was, he was clearly the Ancient Chinese equivalent of Sam Vimes.


did he just invite us over for tea nah man i’m out

This just keeps getting better

I fucking love history.

ok but tbh that story misses a lot of the subtlety of the situation like ok
so this story is the Romance of Three Kingdoms, and essentially takes place between Zhuge Liang, resident tactician extraordinaire, and Sima Yi… OTHER resident tactician extraordinaire.
The two were both regarded as tactical geniuses and recognized the other as their rival. Zhuge Liang had a reputation for ambushing the SHIT out of his opponents and using the environment to his advantage, thus destroying large armies with a small number of men. Sima Yi (who kind of entered the picture later) was a cautious person whose speciality was unravelling his opponent’s plans before they began. So it was natural that the two would butt heads; however, since Sima Yi tended to have more men and resources, he started winning battles against the former. Which, y’know, kinda sucked.
On to the actual story: Zhuge Liang is all like “shit i gotta defend this city with like 10 men.” Literally if he fights ANY kind of battle here, he WILL lose; his only option for survival is not to fight. And that’s looking more and more impossible until he hears that his rival is leading the opposing army. And then he gets this brilliant idea. He basically opens all the gates, sends his men out in civilian clothes to sweep the streets, and sits on top of the gate drinking tea and chilling out and basically makes the whole thing out to be a trap
When Sima Yi comes he’s all like “yo come on in bro”
and Sima Yi is like “yeah he’s never been that obvious about his traps before. this is definitely a bluff” and he’s about to head in when he realizes
wait. he knows that i think he’s bluffing.
and so he gets it in his head that maybe, just MAYBE, Zhuge Liang has this cunning plan that will wipe out his army - recall that he has a pretty good handle on what his rival is capable of. And after a long period of deliberation (which is just like “he know that I know that he knows that etc.”), being the cautious man he is, SIma Yi eventually decides to turn his entire army around and leave.
Zhuge Liang later points out that the plan was based specifically on the fact that he was facing his rival; if it had been anyone else, there’s no way it would have worked. A dumber or less cautious person would have simply charged in and won without breaking a sweat. 
and that’s the real genius here: it was a plan formed entirely just to deceive one man, and it worked.

konec0:

sleepyferret:

shitfacedanon:

dat-soldier:

sonnetscrewdriver:

dat-soldier:

did-you-kno:

Source

back the fuck up

There’s another story that I like about a Chinese general who had to defend a city with only a handful of soldiers from a huge enemy horde that was in all likelihood going to steamroll the place flat within hours of showing up.

So when said horde did arrive, they saw the general sitting outside the city’s open gates, drinking tea. The horde sent a couple of emissaries over to see what was what, and the general greeted them cheerfully and invited them all to come and take tea with him.

The horde decided that this was a scenario that had “MASSIVE FUCKING TRAP” written all over it in beautiful calligraphy and promptly fucked off.

Whoever that general was, he was clearly the Ancient Chinese equivalent of Sam Vimes.

did he just invite us over for tea nah man i’m out

This just keeps getting better

I fucking love history.

ok but tbh that story misses a lot of the subtlety of the situation like ok

so this story is the Romance of Three Kingdoms, and essentially takes place between Zhuge Liang, resident tactician extraordinaire, and Sima Yi… OTHER resident tactician extraordinaire.

The two were both regarded as tactical geniuses and recognized the other as their rival. Zhuge Liang had a reputation for ambushing the SHIT out of his opponents and using the environment to his advantage, thus destroying large armies with a small number of men. Sima Yi (who kind of entered the picture later) was a cautious person whose speciality was unravelling his opponent’s plans before they began. So it was natural that the two would butt heads; however, since Sima Yi tended to have more men and resources, he started winning battles against the former. Which, y’know, kinda sucked.

On to the actual story: Zhuge Liang is all like “shit i gotta defend this city with like 10 men.” Literally if he fights ANY kind of battle here, he WILL lose; his only option for survival is not to fight. And that’s looking more and more impossible until he hears that his rival is leading the opposing army. And then he gets this brilliant idea. He basically opens all the gates, sends his men out in civilian clothes to sweep the streets, and sits on top of the gate drinking tea and chilling out and basically makes the whole thing out to be a trap

When Sima Yi comes he’s all like “yo come on in bro”

and Sima Yi is like “yeah he’s never been that obvious about his traps before. this is definitely a bluff” and he’s about to head in when he realizes

wait. he knows that i think he’s bluffing.

and so he gets it in his head that maybe, just MAYBE, Zhuge Liang has this cunning plan that will wipe out his army - recall that he has a pretty good handle on what his rival is capable of. And after a long period of deliberation (which is just like “he know that I know that he knows that etc.”), being the cautious man he is, SIma Yi eventually decides to turn his entire army around and leave.

Zhuge Liang later points out that the plan was based specifically on the fact that he was facing his rival; if it had been anyone else, there’s no way it would have worked. A dumber or less cautious person would have simply charged in and won without breaking a sweat. 

and that’s the real genius here: it was a plan formed entirely just to deceive one man, and it worked.

(via starshard)

Eeveelutions

(via thewinteriscomingsoldier)

lizawithazed:

cloperella:

hipstermun:

My cute little front ensemble plays the Gravity Falls theme. :’) (ignore the weird blur in the beginning)

that was awesome

this delights me

(via starshard)

faithandfury:

harmonihalo:

literarydisneyprincess:

rabbittwalter:

gamtav88:

brooklyn-knight:

jalexintheimpala:

god bless gordan ramsey 

Dude is only a dick to adults, awesome.

because, those adults should know what they’re doing, they’re cooks these are kids hes teaching to cook, therefore he is patient. 

gordon ramsey is one of my favorite people in the whole world ok

The only reason he gets so angry is because the people he’s yelling at claim to know what they are doing and are charging people accordingly. If you listen to why he’s actually angry more than half the time you’d realize you’d be furious too. This man is beyond patient and kind toward people in normal circumstances, but he is really serious about his profession and what should be demanded of it. He’s one of my favorite people too

But have you seen “Hotel Hell” tho.

There was an elderly couple on there who lost EVERYTHING and he bought them a FREAKING APARTMENT.

The guy has a huge heart, no kidding.

Gordan Ramsey is my favourite person in the entire world

(via starshard)

manzanas-amargas:

Schrödinger opens the box and nothing changes.

The cat lacks vital signs (no heartbeat, no breathing, no brain function): the cat is dead.

The cat exhibits continued animation (blinking, walking, nudging his hand with its little head): the cat is alive.

Schrödinger is afraid.

That has not changed, either.

(via skeletonkili)

nodaybuttodaytodefygravity:

nodaybuttodaytodefygravity:

forever upset that this was not in the movie

image

Goddamn these books are gold mines

(via skeletonkili)

the-charmandrigo-poketribe:

The SSB4 rooster looks good so far!

(via deaneggsandsam)

urtube:

pumpkinspicelatkes:

spookyprincestrider:

sirenlovesong:

summer-tryst:

rightfulqueenofwesteros:

summer-tryst:

White people will literally tattoo ANYTHING on their bodies. ABSOLUTELY. ANYTHING.

why is she tattooing tea on her? did tea save her life? 

I have this feeling that she doesn’t even know what chai means. Probably thought it was spiritual or something. I’m patiently waiting for her response lmao

CHAI IS THE HEBREW WORD FOR LIFE HOLY SHIT LOOK AT THE PICTURE IT SAYS #Hebrew THE WRITING IS IN HEBREW YA’LL ARE BEING PURPOSEFULLY IGNORANT TO SHAME A “WHITE” GIRL WHO ISN’T EVEN WHITE

AYYYY Jew stepping in here.  Chai (chet-Yud) translates to “Life”. Which is what we say out of respect to the familes of those who die. But most importantly it is a symbol of the jewish religion, this being from the saying “Am Yisrael Chai” translating to “The children of Israel are alive”.  Do you know how awesome it is to see someone embracing my culture? I’ve grown up scared to even mention that i’m jewish to people in fear of being attacked or killed. So to see someone tattoo it on themselves is awesome! I mean yeah the Torah forbids it, but it also forbids most medicines so fuck that. All you SJWs go on about “appropriating other people cultures”. But did any of you think to actually ask a Jew?  No.  You all assumed she had “Tea” tattooed on her because saying you’re open minded is completely different to actually having an open mind.
Here’s a little saying for you by Hillel."he who refuses to learn deserves extinction.”
And you didn’t even try to learn.  
Your Anti-Semitism disgusts me and i hope you learnt a lesson here.ps summer-tryst You have embarassed the hell out of yourself. Enjoy eating your own words since Chai “Isnt even spiritual”.  nahh. it just represents the religion that all monotheistic faiths are built upon.  totally not religious.

goyim

OMFG!

urtube:

pumpkinspicelatkes:

spookyprincestrider:

sirenlovesong:

summer-tryst:

rightfulqueenofwesteros:

summer-tryst:

White people will literally tattoo ANYTHING on their bodies. ABSOLUTELY. ANYTHING.

why is she tattooing tea on her? did tea save her life? 

I have this feeling that she doesn’t even know what chai means. Probably thought it was spiritual or something. I’m patiently waiting for her response lmao

CHAI IS THE HEBREW WORD FOR LIFE HOLY SHIT LOOK AT THE PICTURE IT SAYS #Hebrew THE WRITING IS IN HEBREW YA’LL ARE BEING PURPOSEFULLY IGNORANT TO SHAME A “WHITE” GIRL WHO ISN’T EVEN WHITE

AYYYY Jew stepping in here.  Chai (chet-Yud) translates to “Life”. Which is what we say out of respect to the familes of those who die. But most importantly it is a symbol of the jewish religion, this being from the saying “Am Yisrael Chai” translating to “The children of Israel are alive”.  Do you know how awesome it is to see someone embracing my culture? I’ve grown up scared to even mention that i’m jewish to people in fear of being attacked or killed. So to see someone tattoo it on themselves is awesome! I mean yeah the Torah forbids it, but it also forbids most medicines so fuck that. All you SJWs go on about “appropriating other people cultures”. But did any of you think to actually ask a Jew?  No.  You all assumed she had “Tea” tattooed on her because saying you’re open minded is completely different to actually having an open mind.

Here’s a little saying for you by Hillel.

"he who refuses to learn deserves extinction.

And you didn’t even try to learn.  

Your Anti-Semitism disgusts me and i hope you learnt a lesson here.

ps summer-tryst You have embarassed the hell out of yourself. Enjoy eating your own words since Chai “Isnt even spiritual”.  nahh. it just represents the religion that all monotheistic faiths are built upon.  totally not religious.

goyim

OMFG!

(via deaneggsandsam)

angels-sidekick:

Supernatural & Text Posts [2/??]

Here’s another one because I can’t get enough of these cuties

(via deaneggsandsam)